Swings

We were pushing children in swings

There were lots of people there 

Friends and family

Watching and waiting

Staying there was comfortable and easy

They were pulling me to stay

I knew I had to leave

I knew they had to pump their own swings

Or jump out.

I knew I couldn’t stay and push them 

As I was watching 

I knew what I had to do

I knew what I needed to do

I had a difficult time 

I couldn’t vocalize it

They’d be sad and disappointed

I was slowly leaving 

Emotionally

Before

I was thinking

I might have to

 Disappear

Without saying good-bye

I knew I had to go off

And be on my own

By myself

I had to pump my own swing

And jump off.